slightly personal, but I'll share.....

I'm awake at 1:37 am this morning - I laid in bed with heartburn- something I haven't had for several months. I'd like to blame the onions in the salad I had eaten at Shar's cooking class Thursday morning or the lasagna I had at a wedding last night, whatever the reason, I am here in the kitchen looking for some TUMS. But I can't deny what I'm really thinking- my heart has had a big blow today. Uh oh, here come the tears again. Really they should be tears of joy. The kind that you get when a bride and groom say "I do", and I'm hoping that is in me somewhere, but right now they are tears of losing a close friendship, tears of missing her smile, tears of missing her funny little laugh, tears of missing our walks, tears of hearing about her woes and her kids woes and being able to share mine as well and tears of just not having her near. I'll miss her period. 12 1/2 years ago we moved into this neighborhood. Around the corner 6 houses away and practically backyard kiddy-corner neighbors, was a woman 1 year and 2 days younger than I, who too, had 8 kids. A rarity in and of itself. It took several months for us to become friends but when it happened we were inseparable. I've had women that I've been friends with but with her it felt as though we were meant to be sisters or roommates or co-horts in mischievous adventures. (Wait that did happen - remember our initials in the wet cement Vayla). I could be brave with her around. Our sense of humor was crazy fun and nearly identical. Hold on, I need another tissue. Our youngest children were 6 months apart and as they grew they became fast friends. When we moved here, Allan, was 9 months old and so he has grown up with Cameron all his life. For 2 1/2 years of our lives Vayla and I walked Monday-Thursday 3 miles a day. You can say alot in 3 miles, but in all those hours and those many miles together we always had something to talk about. We never ran out of ideas or problems. It's like you could pause a 'tape-recorder' at the end of one days walk and when we got together the next day we could hit 'resume' and the conversation would continue as if nothing had been interrupted at all. She and I could complain softly and kindly about our kids or our spouses, knowing it would not go further than our walks. A 'venting' walk, we liked to call them. I am not a cryer as most of you know, but I could not stop last night. Yeah, it wasn't a 'sobbing my eyes out' type of cry, but it still didn't end. (And continues now as I relate it). I'm sure we will be friends forever but I am losing her by distance. She says 'It's only a ten hour drive: and with texting and emails we can be in touch every day. However, her comforting arm, her darling smile, her look of strength is what will be missing. (new kleenex). I've cried like this before as my kids have left for missions or school or as they moved far away, but I know I will see them again. I know they will be in my home many times over. But for Vayla, I don't have that assurity. Sure I'd like to think she'll be here again, but she has many siblings and many kids to visit or they to visit her and I'll have to be patient to see if I'll fit in somewhere when or if she gets to visit here. She is leaving all her family: 4 kids, another serving his mission, 4 brothers, 4 sisters and her parents. She takes with her her 3 youngest kids. She is suffering more than I. Her darling Hannah has grown close to us, especially Doug and she too will be missed greatly.
Vayla has had a few bumbs and pot-holes along her lifes road and I've seen her suffer through them. I think Lee, her darling new groom, has been sent her way to fill those holes and smooth her bumbs and continue helping rebuild her road of life . I sadly have to give her away. But for Lee from Kanosh, Utah, I gladly will.
I have to leave and go buy more kleenex's.




A list for Vayla to make you smile:
Dr. Phyllis
Party Pants
Girls camp
Girls camp cooks
Girls camp skits
The Price is Right
Education Week visits